How much choice do we REALLY have in 2018?05 / 08 / 2018
“For 400 years? That sounds like a choice.”
I believe that the main reason why Kanye West’s recent statement about slavery has been so triggering has less to do with his disrespect of the ancestors and more to do with what he implied about our level of personal choice right now.
When there’s something important at stake and someone says “You had a choice”, it implies that you deserved the ramifications of that choice.
If there’s nothing at stake, then it doesn’t fucking matter. You had a choice between broccoli or cauliflower. You had a choice between the pink shirt or the striped shirt. No one cares.
If my lactose intolerant ass decides to eat some ice cream and then I have the runs, if you say “That sounds like a choice”, you’re implying that I deserve
to have the runs.…Read More
My New Year’s Intention01 / 20 / 2018
My coach Jo-Na asked me to choose one word to guide the experience I want to create this year. The word came to me instantly: CONNECTION
What about Progress? Prosperity? Success?
Well, I absolutely want those too.. but most of all and at the root of it all, is a desire for connection.
I’ve spent the past few years peeling back layers and layers of fear:
Fear that if I was fully myself, you wouldn’t like me.
Fear that if you disapproved of me, you would make a point to tell me that.
Fear that your criticism would hurt my feelings.
It’s strange… As an artist, I have a need to express myself freely and openly. When I’m not speaking up, I feel like I have a muzzle on.…Read More
Life Lessons on the Subway07 / 13 / 2017
Disclaimer: I realize that the word “crazy” can be triggering for some people. For the purposes of this blog post, I’m using the word “crazy” to describe those who are combative and/or belligerent beyond what’s expected from the average person. It may or may not be connected to any mental health diagnosis.
Don’t engage with crazy.
If you’ve ever taken the NYC subway, you probably learned that rule very quickly. It’s the reason why stoic faces have become an integral part of the NYC landscape. It took an encounter with a weirdo on the subway to drive home this principle, since I clearly wasn’t catching on quickly enough in my personal life. So let me tell you my subway story first…
I got the train one evening, looked around, and made a half a second of eye contact with everyone who was looking at me.…Read More
The Power of the Pole04 / 18 / 2017
Cindy: 😄 “I’m shooting my music video at a pole studio!”
Relative: 😖 “Why do you have to do that? I don’t like that!”
Cindy: 😂 “Why not?”
Relative: 😫 “It’s whorish.”
Okay.. Soooooo.. I am well aware of the reputation pole dancing has. So why in the world would I put that in my first music video?
So glad you asked. 😄 Allow me to tell you about my pole journey…
I was talking to my coach Jo-Ná one crisp fall day, stressing out about whatever was going on in my life, and she stopped me immediately. “Make a list of all the fun stuff you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t gotten around to. Over the next few weeks, you’re going to do them!”
“Well… I want to go to the museum..…Read More
“Irresistible Fraud”04 / 15 / 2017
My debut single, “Irresistible Me” isn’t just a song to me. It’s self-love. It’s empowerment. Unfortunately, for many years it was also totally fraudulent. Not intentionally so, but fraudulent nonetheless..
The story of “Irresistible Me” starts in 2012… I was really, really into this guy. We talked almost every day for months. He complimented me often, but told me that he was not interested in a romantic relationship. He just wanted to be my friend.
What do single people do with attractive, friendly, awesome members of the opposite sex? They date them. So surely, there was something wrong with me if he didn’t want to date me, right?
Oh nooooo! Of course not! 😅 I had lots of great qualities! I could even list like 5 of them!…Read More